The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read

November 18, 2019
Healing from, and learning not to perpetuate, difficult upbringings is the linchpin of this practical, self-care–centered parenting guide from psychotherapist Perry (How to Stay Sane). Her primary focus is on the preschool years, though her range extends to addressing both expectant parents and those with adult children. Throughout, Perry invites readers to examine their attitudes toward parenting, focusing on the effect of painful experiences from one’s own childhood. She urges parents to approach their young offspring as people deserving of their respect, and with whom they will have a lifelong bond. Perry takes a “nudging” approach to bedtime routines and other learnable behaviors, through which children progress in small incremental steps. Her assertion that “all behavior is communication” applies not only to the young child, but to the parent as well; she asks readers to be aware of the messages they perpetuate as role models, to take responsibility for irksome behavior, and to establish an atmosphere of calm even when kids are misbehaving. Perry’s kind but professional tone results in a helpful manual that will appeal to new parents who want an expert on board as they take the time to be reflective in their parenting.